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--> shuxin

*me *

:: ShUXin ::

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04/01/2004 - 04/30/2004 05/01/2004 - 05/31/2004 06/01/2004 - 06/30/2004 07/01/2004 - 07/31/2004 08/01/2004 - 08/31/2004 09/01/2004 - 09/30/2004

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:: zilin ::

Saturday, November 06, 2004

I feel sad. I feel like crying a lot. I’m bored. I feel alone. I don't really feel sad, just "empty". I don't have confidence in myself. I don't like myself. I often feel scared, but I don't know why. I feel mad, like I could just explode! I feel guilty I can't concentrate. I have a hard time remembering things. I don't want to make decisions - its too much work. I feel like I'm in a fog. I’m so tired, no matter how much I sleep. I’m frustrated with everything and everybody. I don’t have fun anymore. I feel helpless. I’m always getting into trouble. I’m restless and jittery. I can’t sit still I feel nervous. I feel disorganized, like my head is spinning. I feel self-conscious. I can’t think straight. My brain doesn’t seem to work. I feel ugly. I don’t feel like talking anymore – I just don’t have anything to say. I feel my life has no direction. I feel life isn’t worth living. I consume alcohol/take drugs regularly. My whole body feels slowed down – my speech, my walk, and my movements. I don’t want to go out with friends anymore. I don’t feel like taking care of my appearance. Occasionally, my heart pounds, I can’t catch my breath, and I feel tingly. My vision feels strange and I feel I might pass out. The feeling passes in seconds, but I’m afraid it will happen again. Sometimes I feel like I'm losing it. I feel "different" from everyone else. I smile, but inside I'm miserable. I have difficulty falling asleep or I awaken between 1 A.M. and 5 A.M. and then I can't get back to sleep. My appetite has diminished - food tastes so bland. My appetite has increased - I feel I could eat all the time. My weight has increased/decreased. I have headaches. I have stomachaches. My arms and legs hurt. I feel nauseous. I'm dizzy. Sometimes my vision seems blurred or slow I'm clumsy. My neck hurts.

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shuxyn winks
at |11:41 AM|

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